ARTICLE BY Sneaker Freaker

Nike Banishes Manny Pacquiao And His Bigotry

Nike has shredded the endorsement contract of 'Mr Number Two' Manny Pacquiao into thousands of tiny fragments following his cretinous comments on same sex relationships. It has been reported that those paper pieces will likely be recycled into confetti for the upcoming Sydney Mardi Gras.

Like many men more in touch with spirituality than reality, Pac Man holds archaic opinions about aspects of life that the coterie of dudes who wrote the bible just didn't want to account for. 'It’s common sense,' he said recently on a talk show when speaking on homosexuality. 'Do you see animals mating with the same sex? Animals are better because they can distinguish male from female. If men mate with men and women mate with women they are worse than animals.'

There are a litany with issues with Pacquiao's crude rationale, the least of which being that humans are animals too and that plenty of other animals act gay on the reg too. Nike came through with the smart brand move and dropped the Filipino from their payroll, impelling Pacquiao to half-apologise through Facebook (he just wants to save the gays from the damnation, he cares, he really cares) before he lost all his endorsements.

The punchbag-cum-politician genuinely does mean no harm, though, and if you can forgive him for his idiocy in following the bible to the letter, you would (ironically) embody the good book's maxim on tolerating such ignorance: 'forgive them; for they do not knowwhat they are doing'.

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